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The Bearded Clam
© Enjoy Your Symptom Records, all rights reserved worldwide (ASCAP).

We set off to sail on a warm windy day
With a bachelor's wife, thirteen sprogs,
And the son of a biscuit eater named Ray

Oh, Stripey did yell to the men
Heave to and lower the nets
Tis here that our treasure most certain be found
And we'll crack Jenny's teacup in the end

Lobster, squid, and fish, smelly presents from the sea
The hag stood her ground and grinned mischievously

"Any Jacks here good enough for me?
To the biggest load I give myself to thee"
Suddenly the squify screamed, "There's something in there.
"Something lurking just under the sea."

The vessel did go to careen
"Man overboard," I heard myself scream
A giant bearded clam with its open, gaping gash
Did swallow the ship, turned to smile, and returned to the deep